Sunday, 18 November 2012
Good Job I'm Not A Bad Loser
I have written so far 15,287 words (little counter to the right should verify this too :D). Those words seriously need editing mind. But that is 14,179 words short of where I should be today. (Becky Black will love that I have a spreadsheet to calculate this. Spread sheets are her thing. They can be my thing too. It's maybe why we get on so well.) But this is the reason why I will not win. NaNoWriMo calculates I need to write 2629 words a day for the rest of the month. It's not going to happen. Not unless I want my RSI to come and hit me in the face! (Well, the wrist actually).
So I'm a winner in that I'm writing again, with everything that real life is throwing at me I think this is a damn good achievement. After November I will need to get back to editing The Wedding Favour and being tough with myself about it. You will not make it as a writer if you do not put the work in, Teresa!
However, as I said to my writing friends in my little writing group, I think I'm too tough on myself. I'm impatient basically, and want it to happen as soon as possible, and stress myself that it is not, because it's a vicious circle. I won't see writing achievements if I'm not writing and working at it. However, I think I need to take a step back, just keep at it, write when I can write (and not beat myself up when I can't) and eventually it will come. My desperation is because I am miserable in my job. If writing could pay the bills, I would be happier. So, I need to find something else don't I?
It doesn't mean I'm giving up my dream of writing, it just means finding something more enjoyable to do to bring in the bread and butter, and work around my children (which is priority) and my writing. I'm tired of getting up at 5.30am every Saturday morning. I want my weekends back!
I thought about becoming a teaching assistant, and I'm not striking that off, but maybe for a quicker solution, and less training required, maybe I need to find a job in a school (or college) doing admin.