I Am Grateful

My RSI is still playing up, even with much rest over the Christmas period, so I'm going to very quickly bash this out but possibly not take too much time over editing... sorry. I'm finding it quite frustrating if truth be told. And I love using my PC, I love my new admin job and I love typing, etc. 

However, it's made me very grateful that I got involved with UW two and a half years ago. If my RSI suffering stresses nothing else, it shows I can't go back to full-time work in an office, even if I love the work. 

I joined UW to fund my writing passion but now I know it also needs to fund me not going back to full-time work. 

But to be honest, I don't want to go back to full time work, and in fact I would love to ditch it altogether, one day! Hence I joined my network marketing business to achieve this. Imagine, my desk time could be just for writing, and I would be able to manage my RSI even better - being my own boss. 

So, if you're like me, you've got a passion that doesn't really pay that well. Or is a bit sporadic. I've not been paid badly this year, but the royalties aren't reliable, and being a single mum, I don't have someone else bringing in a reliable income, so that I can be the full time writer I desire to be. 

It takes a while for some writers to get to the stage that their royalties from their back list are earning them enough to write the next book. Because when you're writing that draft, you're not getting paid. We only really start getting paid from publication day. And how much we get paid will be down to the publisher and their marketing strategy. And the reality for most writers is that we're not paid anywhere near a full time salary.

I'm not really a New Years Resolutions setter... but I'm stealing this from UW. 

My New Years resolution is to help more people save money and/or like me, earn money. And in turn help change people's lives for the better. Imagine that second pay day every month that can eventually be more than your salary. Fancy something like that? If you're in a Journey of Boredom (JOB) each day, maybe it's time to look at making a change. Life is way too short...  Long-term you'll free up time to be able to do the things you enjoy. It won't happen overnight, but if you start NOW, you'll get there quicker than waiting until you're ready, the time is right, or for that lottery win... 

Message me if you'd like a chat friend to friend. No obligation. 

Life is too short to wish every day away. 

There's Another Adult In The House

Where has my baby boy gone? All of a sudden I am now the owner of an adult! I don't even feel mature enough to have an adult as a child. 

Happy 18th Birthday, Ben. 

Even when you drive me to frustration, I do love you. I am incredibly proud of your achievements. 

Continue to work hard and follow your dreams, and the universe will provide. But the MX5 might not be an ideal first car ha ha! 

And now for the photos! I know I post this picture a lot (above), but it's my favourite. I could watch him sleep and I just loved that blue sleepsuit on him. It was my favourite. These moments I do miss. 

And then this is Ben off to his first ever football practice, and Kieran would watch from the sidelines until he was old enough to join him. 

I love how Kieran looks at his big brother so adoringly, and yet now, the bickering drives me mad! Hopefully, when they both emerge from their teenage years, they'll be the best of friends again. 

I could share loads of photos as I have LOADS of photos. 

But this is Ben pretty much now. Taller than me, and possibly the spitting image of me (poor boy). Ben on holiday in Corfu. Still only 17. 

He's training to be a civil engineer, and to be honest, it's such a suited job. He's always loved building things with lego. He's loved steam trains, and still does, and once, Grandad couldn't drag him off the seafront, where he was more than happy to watch the cranes building the new Grand Pier after it had burnt down. 

I love how you're afraid of dogs but not swans. I love that you send me funny reels via instagram, some of them proving we both have the same silly sense of humour. I love that you drink coffee. You appreciate nature, the stars, and good quality chocolate. 

You're not perfect. Nobody is. But I do hope that your dad and I have done enough for you to go out into this big wide world, and make it your own. 

Lots of love,  Mum x x x 

49

So I'm now in the last year of my 40's. This is technically, my 50th year... 

The last couple of years has been a dramatical change to my mindset, all thanks to joining Utility Warehouse. I was probably getting stronger already, as I'd dropped online dating. I'd clearly got to the point where I didn't want timewasters in my life anymore and that if I was meant to be with someone, eventually the universe would provide. 

However, the past couple of years has really strengthened my belief that I am more than happy to live on my own. I have enough friends and things going on around me to keep me busy. And I'll never be bored because I will always have writing. 

UW has given me something that I also desired; financial freedom. And the belief that I will have it. 

I am concerned that if I did find someone else in this life, I don't want to lose my financial independence. I will want to own my own house. I don't want to be in a relationship to rely on that person's income. And I definitely don't want to give up on the decision making. 

In my marriage it had been so easy to hand over all the financial reins to my husband. But now I've got them back, I don't want to ever lose that again. 

I was supposed to post this around my birthday... I started writing it in October, the day before my birthday, but opps... I've neglected my blog. 

Anyway, here's to the last year in my forties, and to my fifty things for fifty... 

Social Media Overwhelm Anyone?

Is anyone else feeling social media overwhelm? Or even overload? 

If you own a business you get told that you need to be on social media. Although, you're not to 'sell' but you need to be showing you, your human side, not some robot. People buy from people and all that. 

On the writer side, I'm on there to connect with readers, but find myself followed by other writers, or book reviewers offering to review my books - for a fee! A few readers connect, but I've not got to the point of being bombarded with fan mail! 

And when I think, right, let's do some social media, but there are so many social media channels... Where do I go first? 

I sit on business networking, listen to all these social media gurus that tell us what we should and shouldn't be doing. But quite honestly, I don't have the time. I'm a fairly organised woman but bloody hell, the last thing I want to do on a Sunday is schedule my social media for the bloomin' week! And it really feels like a life suck sometimes. But once upon a time social media was spontaneous... now it's scheduled... 

And it's not always positive. We're all comparing, and bitching. It's just drama. I try to keep my posts on my social media positive now, but that doesn't mean my life is all rosey. (It's not bad actually, I can't complain. UW has changed my mindset for the better, two of my books are in Prime Reads... I'm happily single... and I'm digressing...) 

It used to be about friends connecting - especially on Facebook - which I do love, because I've reconnected with so many people that I wouldn't have done otherwise. But now Facebook feels like it's an advertising platform - so I see these friends less and less. And then you're panicking if you're still actually 'friends'. 

Seriously, I Google something for research purposes, or take a look at something on Amazon, and the next minute I'm constantly seeing adverts for these things either via Instagram or Facebook. It's a good job I write romance... dread to think what my adverts would contain if I wrote horror or crime. 

I bought a phone case from a company and now all I see is this company! FFS! I've bought the phone case - how many more do I need? Or do phone's need a wardrobe of phone cases now? 

I've tried Reels. But that can frustrate the hell out of me. Take half-an-hour, or longer, just when I should be putting my phone down to go to bed, to create a reel for it to not load, or there's a typo, or it's not quite done what I wanted it to do. Or it's just fucking crashed! At midnight! FFS! 

It's taken me less time to write this blog post - but nobody will read it because it's not a video. I don't even get comments anymore... Do you remember when people left comments on blogs? God, those were the days! 

If you have read this blog post, all the way to the end, thank you! Xxxx I just needed to get that off my chest. 

Dear Book Reviewer

This may seem a weird blog post but I've decided, as an author who is constantly directly messaged and emailed on a regular basis on this subject, that I would share my thoughts to new writers/authors out there. Just in case you're not really sure on this subject. 

As a writer/author we do not pay for book reviews. 

It's bad enough we don't get paid that much in royalties really - the average author doesn't earn enough to live off. Unless we're selling books in the hundreds of thousands... we don't earn a lot for a year's work (or longer). 

If a "book reviewer" messages you about reviewing your book, you say, "Thank you very much, I would love you to review my book. Here are the places you can buy it. It's only 99p on Amazon!" (Or words to that effect.)

My understanding is that these people just want free books. And then want to be paid to give an "honest" review. But how honest is it if you've given them the book for free and paid them to write a review? 

And quite frankly, if I've given them my book and PAID for a review, it better be FIVE STARS! 

And you have to think, am I going to earn that fee back in royalties? Probably not. 

If a book reviewer wants free books, this is what NetGalley is for - and I have my gripes about NetGalley too, but I won't go into that here. 

I'm really sorry, dear book reviewer, but genuine book reviewers are readers. 

taken from The Family Upstairs by Lisa Jewell

If you read a book and you enjoy it, you leave a review. Some like to rip it to shreds too. Us authors would prefer they kept those comments to themselves, as we are human and usually blood, sweat and tears has gone into writing our books. 

And if it's traditionally published, therefore gone through editors and a publisher feels it's good enough to invest in, then I believe there is no such thing as a bad book. It just wasn't a book for you. (I agree with Phin in The Family Upstairs.) 

I know for some writers, me included, this may mean that reviews can be few and far between. But dear author, please do not pay for reviews!