Gardening Therapy - I Talk To My Plants

On the Sunday of the May Bank Holiday weekend, I'd written over a thousand words, and although it was a tad windy, the sun was out, so I thought I best get out in the garden in the afternoon.

Dad had picked me up some extra plants and I knew I needed to get them into the beds. Next week, the weather forecast wasn't looking so bright, plus I'd be working, and gardening is obviously done best in the sunshine. 

Pre-lockdown I would leave the gardening mostly to Dad. I potted up the hanging baskets, but that was about my forte. Then, in 2020, when my gardener wasn't allowed into the house, I had to stand on my two feet, roll up my green sleeves and just get on with it. 

Dad does still do a lot of the hard work, like cutting back the roses early spring etc. And my garden would not look so lovely if it wasn't for his hard work in it too. But I've got better at gardening. And I love it.

my favourite rose bush

I came in Sunday after getting all the bedding plants into my beds in the front and back garden, and I felt good. My mental health had had a boost. I'd been in the sunshine with the bees, busily working. I mean, literally, I had a bee on a plant right by my ear, and they weren't bothered by me. And I wasn't bothered by them. 

I even enjoy mowing the lawn. I do try to get the boys to do it - more to make them do a chore. And Dad sometimes cuts the lawn for me, if I'm at work and rain is due the next few following days.

My pond

All these people with their plastic grass (that's another subject where I could get on my soapbox on how bad that is for the planet and wildlife) - you're missing out on helping your mental health. Just get out in the garden, prune the plants, talk to the birds, the bees  - and the plants, like I do.

If you're struggling with your mental health, seriously, get out in your garden. It'll boost your mental and physical health. 

I Am Happy!

I was speaking to one of my bestest friends on Sunday evening. We catch up regularly over WhatsApp and have a video chat. It's a habit we got into during lockdown, and when we haven't seen each other in a few weeks, we like to have a chat. I love her dearly. 

Anyway, I threw into conversation that I was thinking about going back to online dating. Just to maybe get a date. Nothing serious. Not like before. And she said, "I was just telling Nicola the other day that you're the happiest I've ever seen you. Don't do it." 

And she is right. I am happy right now. I love my life, I love being single and quite frankly, not having unfit middle-aged men that have so much baggage and drama mucking me around.

Don't get me wrong, some days are tough, like everyone, I have my good and my bad days. But generally, I am more than happy sharing my life with my boys, my family and my friends, and even going it alone. I am happy! 

I caught up with another friend yesterday. We lunched in Bristol. She was telling me about her online dating dramas and it assured me that I didn't need it. My mental health is so much better off with not doing online dating. 

It's so time consuming and mentally draining. Mainly this is because the messages you receive, and the lack of quality of men who message you, really starts chipping away at your self esteem. You start thinking is this the best I can do? Do I only deserve to be treated like crap? 

So nope. Not doing it. Not going back there. I love my single life. And quite frankly, if a guy does come along, he really is going to have to be some hot hero to turn my head.

I'll wait for the Universe to provide... (If it could provide a fit 50-something Norman Reedus, that would be perfect... ha ha!)

Lockdown Gardener

We're into our eleventh week, lockdown is easing and I thought I'd share what I have taken from these past few months.

As some of you may know, my dad is also my gardener.

When I moved into this house, seven years ago, the garden wasn't really looking up to much. He removed all the membrane that was covering the beds, and it's had some transitional phases - the beds have got bigger in places!

All my Facebook friends have complimented me on my garden, and I've always said I can't take the credit.

In some ways, even this year, I still can't It is what is is due to the past years of gardening.

Entering its eight summer, as we went into lockdown, I had to take over the garden. Dad left me jobs to do, that he would usually have done, maybe more for my sanity than anything, still calling in occasionally on a Friday when I was at work to do the bigger jobs.

Because we didn't have a cold winter, I rescued some bedding plants in case I couldn't get hold of any.

Between me and my son we've been mowing the lawns (front and back). I actually like mowing the lawn!

During Easter we painted the fences, without Grandad to rally us!

Then, we've had these freakishly lovely days of summer sunshine! So I've been watering and keeping on top of the pots.


Anyway, I've come to find time to tend my garden. Before or after dinner I've pottered; to cut back dead heads, plant up any plants, etc. and water them! I especially make time at the weekend, too.

I've purchased new patio furniture I desperately needed and treated myself to a new chimnea - which I built all by myself!

I've always appreciated my garden, (and gardens generally) but I've  never been too involved in the actual gardening. This year I've had to, and I've loved it.

Not only has it probably helped with my fitness, because you're walking about the garden, grabbing lots of vitamin D from the sunshine, it's actually helped with my mental wellbeing too.

So, I'm going to try to take more responsibility for my garden from now on, (with Dad to assist when I need him.)